My Story

Nobody warns you about the moment you outgrow your own life.

By the time I was 35, I had built everything I thought I wanted, the career, the life, the identity I had spent years constructing. And then, slowly, I started to outgrow it. That was the confusing part. It wasn't that the plan failed. I got the plan. But I had no language for what was happening. I couldn't explain it to the people around me. I couldn't even explain it to myself. I moved back in with my parents at 38. I felt like a failure at exactly the moment I should have felt like a success.

So I did what most of us do, I tried to fix it. Because that's what we've been taught: something feels broken, you fix it. You control it. You push through. But here's what nobody tells you: you can't figure out where you're going until you know who you're becoming.

And that's the thing about identity transitions, they don't work the way we think change works. They are internal before they are ever external. There is a process to them, a real one, with a shape and a logic. When nobody tells you that process exists, you can spend years making things harder than they need to be. That's what happened to me.

Understanding that changed everything.

That's why I now teach and map the terrain of identity transitions, those moments when you outgrow your life, your career, or the version of yourself you've been living as. I bring back the concept of liminality, long understood by anthropologists, because as long as humans have existed, we have known that we are not linear beings. We've just forgotten how to navigate that.

I believe identity is not fixed. I believe life is not linear. And I believe that feeling lost is not a sign that something went wrong, it's a sign that something is changing. There is a way through. I'm just here to show you the map.

Today, that work lives in workshops, an online course, and Pivoters Club, a community and ecosystem I'm building for people navigating identity transitions.